August 15, 2019

Linnea Skoglöv: Portraits of Love

Linnea Skoglöv: Portraits of Love
Cigarette 
 
Waking up slowly to a room set in darkness, eyes searching for light but finding nothing but
a silhouette. 
You on one side of the bed and I on the other, not touching but I still feel you on my skin
like my mouth senses the aftertaste of a cigarette. 
A cigarette you smoked even though I begged you not to, I turned and said I won’t kiss you
ever again but you hugged me from behind and what was I supposed to do. 
So I kissed you.  
And you tasted worse than when you apologise for your breath in the morning, but the second
your lips touched mine I had already forgiven you. 
Because when you look at me my heart suddenly belongs to a hummingbird, beating right out
of my chest.
And I need to feel your fingers between mine, your arms around my shoulders, your lips on
my cheek. That’s how you give me the peace that I seek.  
And when I’m not with you, and the war inside me breaks loose, I’d give anything to taste the
cigarette you smoked when I begged you not to.  

 
Perfect canvas  
 
Leave all your insecurities with me and I’ll show you their beauty.  
Hide all your fears behind my back and I’ll show you the courage you think you lack. 
Lend me your tears and I’ll guide them to the ocean, let the waves crash over your doubts
and turn them into crystals of salt. 
Show me your hands and let me take them into mine, allow me to share your worlds weight
and stop for a second, listen to your heart rate. 
Feel the pulsating blood rushing through your veins, let me touch the scars where your
blood once escaped. I’ll show you your skin is too precious to be used as a canvas where
art is scraped. 
Look into my eyes, and truly see, the most perfect reflection of you is seen through me.  
And I will make it my life’s mission to make sure you never doubt that you are a creation
so divine that even the stars are jealous of how brightly you shine. 

 
Scars 
 
I want to read every scar on your body like a book with no ending, the last page will always
be pending. 
Forever evolving as your body grows older, each scar is fading and the memory of how they got
there burns colder. 
My fingertips reads your body like a book for the blind, never scared of what they might find.  
You’ve got cuts like trophies you’ve won in fights, you’re not exactly proud but they make
for good stories on drunken nights. 
Your arms full of reminders from earlier days, from a little boy not scared of pains
permanent grace.  
A little boy that sometimes still makes himself known, a little boy that longs for the
feeling of a broken bone. Or a broken heart, or anything at all, just to keep the memory fresh
of how it feels to fall. 
And when you do you’re instantly ready to rise. To you heartbreak isn’t defeat but more of a
prize. 
No matter how much you lost, you gained even more, cause you treat each broken body part like
something that deserves to be explored.
As I keep reading your body and it’s tales of adventure, I turn open the first page of my own
story and vow to every experience surrender. 

 
Caramel sauce 
 
I'm over you I say, out loud, although no ones around. I'm over you. 
With a voice as clear as the polished whiskey glasses we used to drink wine out of, I'm over
you.
With red stained lips I smirk, one bottle down and I do not miss you. I'm over you. 
Like crossing a bridge I've left your island behind, confidently knowing I can never return
I finish a second bottle because I am over you.
Over you like your duvet, draped just right that morning I woke up early to draw you in your sleep. 
Over you like my thighs on your balcony that night your roommate feel asleep watching
cartoons.
Over you like the moon over our intertwined fingers, shining in a way making you look too
perfect to be real. Over you.
I'm over you like caramel sauce on an ice cream Sunday, clinging to the freezing cold. 
Licking my sticky fingers is bittersweet, tasting you go down my throat I resist the urge
to spit it back up to taste you again.
I'm over you. 

 
That smile of yours 
 
That smile of yours,  
Is like rainbow sprinkles on a chocolate sundae, like the smell of spring and fresh cut grass. 
That smile of yours makes me forget you broke my heart into more pieces than the Sistine
chapel's windows of stained glass.
 
That smile of yours,  
Sparkles like the sun dancing on top of bright blue waves, sparkles like his eyes tracing
hers down the aisle. 
That smile of yours makes me forget your lips on her milky skin and your childish denial. 
 
That smile of yours,  
Cuts the inside of my lungs like sharpened milk teeth, cuts the rhythm in my chest like a
skilled hunter dissembles a deer. 
That smile of yours reminds me of a time where mine was lost and you decide to disappear. 
 
That smile of yours, 
Taste like warm blood down my throat, taste like cold metal on my tongue.  
That smile of yours makes me foolishly miss the toxic air you breathed down my lung. 
 

Trust me 
 
Don’t ever be afraid, know that I will protect you, give me your heart and soul, know I want
the best for you.
Trust me 
Feel me inspire you, give into your deepest desires and let me guide you. 
Trust me 
Close your eyes and follow me, turn a deaf ear to all noise but listen to me, keep your mouth
closed but taste me.
Trust me 
Leave your body in my loving hands and let them caress you, don’t ever feel embarrassed but
know that I see you. 
Trust me 
I see every inch of beauty visible to the eye, but most importantly I see your inner beauty 
colouring the night sky.
With stars that shine as bright as you, just trust me when I say, always trust in you. 

***

Linnea is a Swede that caught the travel bug and has been living out of a suitcase for the best part of the last decade. New and exciting places and people are her inspiration, and writing is her way of making sense of what she’s experienced.

#life#lovers#poetry#relationships

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